How to Write a Thank You Card {And Why You Should Teach Your Children to do This}

Gratitude 101

Do you remember sitting down at the dining room table the day after Christmas, or your Birthday or ANY special occasion in which you were the recipient of a gift to write the thank you card that was the requisite response if you were to be considered the well-mannered lady or gentleman you parents expected you to be?

It went something like this:

It probably seemed like a chore at the time. You struggled for just the right words. You chewed on the end of your pencil. But it was the right thing to do. Your Aunt Gracie was comforted by the knowledge that the time spent picking out your special gift was not wasted.

The best thank you cards are simple but sincere.

Gratitude is more than just jotting down random thoughts in a journal. It starts with actually expressing gratitude to a person or group of people who took action on your behalf to make your life richer.

I imagine most kids won’t sit down and do this on their own. So it falls to Mom and Dad to make sure that they learn how to do this, and accept it as a fact of life that they are required to do this.

Of course, just like making them eat their veggies, brush their teeth, and clean their rooms, valuable life lessons are learned along the way.

This page contains affiliate links to products I use, love, and recommend.  See my full disclosure policy.

How to write a thank-you Card

1) Acknowledge the person by name

Start by acknowledging the person by name. Make absolutely certain that you have the correct spelling!

Dashing off a quick note without a greeting doesn’t look thoughtful or intentional.

You want to let a specific person know that you appreciate the gift you received or the kindness they did for you. It’s important to write and send the note as soon as you can, this is not a time to procrastinate.

Dear Meemaw,

or

Dear Mr. Anderson,

to address a specific person who sent you a gift.

You can also address a group in this way.

Dear Kelly Family,

or

Dear Friends of The Humane Society,

to thank a family for a gift or a group for their participation in your event.

2) Thank them for the specific action

Let them know that you appreciate the gift you received, or their kindness, or their participation in the charity event.

Acknowledge the specific action that was taken.

Your gift of ______________ (calligraphy pens or the big box of crayons, the one with the sharpener in the back of the box) was exactly what I wanted this year

or

Your teams’ contribution to our fundraising event helped us reach our goals

or

Raking my Grandma’s yard this fall while she was sick went above and beyond being a good neighbor

3) Convey the effect of their action

Send a clear message of the positive effect their action had on you.

This beautiful scarf will keep me warm all winter

or

Your enthusiasm kept all of the volunteers motivated

or

Your thoughtful gift of a _____________ (housewarming or wedding gift) has already found a place in our new home

4) Repeat your appreciation for what was done

Thanks again for your thoughtful gift

or

Your talents are certainly appreciated

or

We are so grateful for your kindness

5) Include a warm, sincere closing

Closing a note written to a good friend or family member might include nicknames or “inside jokes”

Love, Pookie

or

Your BFF, Angie

Thanking a neighbor or group of volunteers will probably be less personal, but should still be warm and personable

Sincerely

or

Kind Regards

Why we {and the kids} should write thank-you Letters

Take a moment to extend common courtesies whenever possible and don’t let a kindness go unnoticed.

Email and texting have their place. They are great for a message, a quick business correspondence, or deciding who’s picking up the kids after soccer practice.

I guess, some people actually break up this way, but that’s another issue.

This digital communication is not so effective for a more personal, heartfelt expression. You can’t use scented stationery and nothing compares to a handwritten note.

Furthermore, there are not enough emojis in the world to express what a well-written thank you card can.

Expressing gratitude has a profoundly positive effect on one’s well being.

For children, who are naturally egocentric up until around age 7, it is a subtle exercise in having them look outside their own viewpoint. Traits like empathy and compassion are positive outcomes of teaching children about gratitude. At some point, we want them to learn that they are not the center of the universe.

Practicing handwriting, eye-hand coordination, and organizing thoughts are some of the happy little unintended consequences of teaching the little ones how to write a thank-you note.

Sort of like accidentally sprinkling sea salt on dark chocolate and then running into some caramel.

So, whether the notes are written in pencil on notebook paper or you have chosen some lovely notecards with the perfect gel pen make sure you are sending thank you cards to the people who have, through a gift or a generous unselfish act, made an effort to enrich your life.